


turned into a monster

by notquitepunkrock



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Murder?, Sad Will Solace, pjosecretsanta2k17
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 14:37:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13148745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/notquitepunkrock/pseuds/notquitepunkrock
Summary: The cabin was dark. All of the bunks lining the walls were neatly made with the curtains pulled open. In fact, nothing seemed out of place. The instruments stacked in the corner were untouched, the door to the loft was open with no light was coming out, and the lockers that the Apollo kids used as closets were all locked tightly. Nico sighed, and turned to leave, but a small sniffle caught his attention just as he reached the door.---Will has a bad day, but Nico is there to make it hurt less.





	turned into a monster

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Echolune](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Echolune/gifts).



> MERRY CHRISTMAS! Even though this is super not a Christmassy one shot... a holiday party is mentioned? 
> 
> This is my pjo secret santa gift for echolune! I hope you like it <3 Happy holidays!

It was an hour into the holiday party when Nico approached the corner where Percy, Piper, and Jason were standing. “Has anyone seen Will?” he asked quietly, frowning in a way that made him look at least five years older.

Piper stood on her toes, scanning the dining pavilion. “I don’t see him here. Did you check the infirmary? Maybe he hasn’t left yet,” she suggested. Nico’s frown deepened.

“I checked, the only one there is Hallie Keystone,” he said, sounding slightly panicked. “Are you sure you haven’t seen him? He was supposed to be here a half an hour ago.”

Percy shook his head. “I’ll keep my eye out, but maybe try the Apollo cabin before you get too worked up,” he said. Nico sighed and nodded.

“You’re right, Percy,” he admitted. “I’ll see you later.” With that, he whirled around on his heel and hurried away from the dining pavilion.

The cabin area was abandoned. Not even Hestia sitting in her favorite spot beside the fire. Nico half-jogged through the darkened space to the Apollo cabin, which glittered brilliantly gold despite the darkness. He pushed open the door and peered around main room.

The cabin was dark. All of the bunks lining the walls were neatly made with the curtains pulled open. In fact, nothing seemed out of place. The instruments stacked in the corner were untouched, the door to the loft was open with no light was coming out, and the lockers that the Apollo kids used as closets were all locked tightly. Nico sighed, and turned to leave, but a small sniffle caught his attention just as he reached the door.

“Will?” he called softly, turning back around. He peered through the darkness until he spotted the figure curled up in a dark corner of the cabin, near a door to the recording booth. Nico crept closer, and as he did the shadow of a person became clearer.

The curly blond hair was the first thing he could see clearly, gleaming in the little light the moon offered through the window. Next was the bright orange of his camp t-shirt, which was ripped and bloodied more than Will’s normally were, and a couple sizes too small. Last, and most worryingly, was the way the knuckles of his tanned hands were turning white as gripped them together.

“Will, it’s me, Nico. I’m going to turn a light on, alright?” Nico asked cautiously, standing a few feet away and waiting for the older boy to acknowledge him. It took a few moments, but finally Will gave a shaky, almost imperceptible nod. Nico carefully stepped into the recording studio and flipped on the light, leaving the door open enough that they could see each other. He didn’t want to turn on the main lights yet. That might be too much for Will.

“I’m sitting down now,” Nico continued, slowly lowering himself to the ground in front of Will. He noticed the boy had his eyes squeezed tightly shut, and was biting on his lower lip hard enough it nearly broke the skin. “Can you tell me what’s wrong?”

Will shrugged, opening his eyes for only a moment before squeezing them shut again. Nico felt distinctly helpless at the lack of response.

“I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me,” he tried, adopting a gentle voice similar to the one that Will used when dealing with young patients. Will lifted his head. He scooted a fraction of an inch closer. “Come on, Solace, you’ll feel better if you just talk to me.”

“I’m a monster,” Will admitted, voice cracking. Nico winced at the huskiness of his normally cheery voice. He’d been crying.

Desperate to bring some light to the situation, Nico tilted his head and studied Will. “You don’t look like any of the monsters I’ve ever seen - and I’ve seen plenty,” he said dryly, resisting the urge to jump for joy when the other boy cracked a small smile.

The smile was gone as quickly as it’d appeared. Nico frowned again, resting a gentle hand on Will’s knee. “Hey, talk to me,” he said quietly.

“I lost a patient,” Will admitted. “It wasn’t my fault, I don’t think. It was a dryad. She’d been attacked by a hellhound in the woods. The fact that she even made it to the edge of the wood in the state she was in… but it feels like I didn’t do enough to save her.”

Nico sighed. Now he understood. “Will, it doesn’t sound like you’re a monster,” he said, voice low. “You tried to save her. Sometimes it’s just a person’s time to go.” 

Will squeezed arms tighter around his legs. “That’s not all,” he whispered, the words directed more towards his knees than anything. “I’ve… Neeks, I’ve done bad things before. I’ve killed people for no real reason. Just because they made me angry.”

“What does that have to do with-” Nico started, but Will barrelled over him, squeezing his hands tightly, so tightly he was close to digging his nails deep into his skin. Now that he’d started talking, there seemed to be no stopping him.

“I was off today,” he said. “I could have saved that dryad, but I was off, and then I didn’t stitch up Connor’s leg the right way and I completely forgot that Kieran McNeal was supposed to get her hormone shot today, and I  _ never  _ do stuff like that.”

He was getting frantic now, staring off over Nico’s head as he spoke. His voice was shaking, his Texan accent getting thicker than Nico had ever heard it. “I was twelve. He- He was one of the farm hands. He broke into the house one night and stole all of the money Granny was saving up. He beat her to hell and back, and then went for Momma. I was sleeping in the backroom. I wouldn’t have even known ‘cept he ran past on the way out the door.”

“Will, you don’t have to tell me this,” Nico said, carefully taking hold of his wrists and prying his arms apart. He held them limply in his lap. Nico had never been fond of touching other people, but he thought that Will needed a hug more than anything right now. 

“I need to tell someone,” Will said. “I- God, you have to believe me, Nico, I was pissed. He’d hurt my family. Momma and Granny, they were all I had. I chased him down and I… I gave him a heart attack so painful he died screaming. And he wasn’t the first one. I ran away after that. Today was four years to the day.”

Nico hummed softly. “How many times?” he asked quietly. His heart ached, but not because he thought Will was a monster. He was a demigod - all demigods had killed people. He’d been protecting his family. No, it ached because of how much Will truly hated himself for this.

WIll shrugged, and a few tears slid down his cheeks. “There were a few. People who hurt my mom, mostly, really hurt her. But that time… That time was the only one that I intended to  _ kill _ someone. I’m a murderer.” He tried to pull his hands away from Nico’s grip, but the smaller boy was too strong. Will settled for ducking his head, hiding behind his curls as he began to cry.

“Will, you did the right thing,” Nico said seriously. Will froze, still sniffling, and peered up through his bangs. “What he did was wrong. You were young. It was the only thing you could think of. Have you done it on purpose since?” 

“No,” Will said quickly. “No, no, I wouldn’t. Never!” 

Nico nodded. “You’re no monster, and if you’re a murderer, well, so am I. I’ve done worse than that for the sake of survival or even out of sheer anger. We’re heroes. We do what has to be done.” 

Will seemed to consider for a moment before throwing himself forward, wrapping his arms tightly around Nico’s waist and burying his face in his neck. Nico felt his face turn red, but he raised his hands to pull Will closer, carding a hand through his curls. His skin was damp where Will was crying into the crook of his neck, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to mind.

They stayed like that for a long time, wrapped up together on the floor of the Apollo cabin. If any of Will’s siblings chose to come in at that moment, they would have been very confused at the pair of them. 

Finally, after Will had stopped crying and whispered an apology, Nico pulled back just a bit. “Did you want to go to the camp holiday party?” he asked gently. “We can skip it if you want.” 

Will’s cheeks turned red. “I would, uh, rather not go,” he admitted. “I just, I can’t.”

Nico shrugged, silently thankful that the other boy had chosen the option that meant no more social interaction. “Let’s go back to my cabin and watch a movie then,” he suggested. “I’ll even let you pick.” Will seemed to brighten at that.

“ _ Anything _ I want?” he asked, grinning mischievously.

“If it’s Rodgers and Hammerstein I’m going to sleep in the Poseidon cabin tonight,” Nico warned, pulling himself to his feet and offering Will a hand. Will clambered up, looking a bit like a newborn foal as he tried to get his long limbs to cooperate. Again, Nico studied him. “Wait a second, is that my shirt?” he asked suddenly, cheeks turning red.

Will bit his lip. “Maybe,” he said, then changed the subject quickly. “I’ll grab the movie, you’d better go get things set up!”

Nico laughed to himself, and let himself out of the cabin. He headed towards the Big House, intent on stealing some snacks from the rec room. The sounds of laughter and someone aggressively singing the Dreidel Song overtop of a Christmas soundtrack drifted up from the dining pavilion, where the party was still in full swing.

It took everything in Nico not to melt into the shadows, but he was intent on enjoying the cool night air as he hurried along. He didn’t want to leave Will alone for too long, lest he get upset again. He didn’t deserve to get upset again.

Will Solace was definitely not a monster, Nico thought. He was, quite possibly, the only purely good thing in the world.

**Author's Note:**

> comments and kudos make me happy  
> follow me on tumblr @moonys-crappy-doodles


End file.
